Feel Thinner Than You Look

I know how to feel thinner than I look.

It is really simple and I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before.

All you need to do is wear pants (trousers for you Brits) that are just a bit too big for you. It makes you feel thin. Really it does.

Of course it’s even better when the pants were once tight and now they are a bit loose. (and who cares if they are your fat pants and you can’t get into your medium pants let alone your skinny pants)

So here is to my slightly loose jeans getting a bit looser.

Yay me. (for now)

Although I would like to fit into a dress like this again one day. Soon please.

There’s Hope For Me Yet

It seems that there might still be hope for me.

 

If past experience is any hint, it would seem that I need to get really heavy and out of shape before I am properly disgusted with myself. Then as if by magic, a switch just goes off in my head and makes me start exercising and watching what I eat.

 

I don’t know why it is that I have to go from one extreme to another.  But maybe this time will be the time that I learn to maintain a healthy lifestyle instead of yo-yoing.

 

It has now been a few weeks since I started walking (and attempting to run) and I started swimming as well. I haven’t lost very much weight but I have loads less jiggles (yes I know, TMI) and I am feeling healthier and stronger.

 

It’s still a long road (especially the one I walk at 5:15 in the morning) but I do think there is still hope for me. Maybe one day I will look like this again… (Or at least something close.)

And Now I Understand What My Problem Is!

I have been agonizing over the fact that I have been gaining weight.

And then today I got the email below and I had a real aha! moment. Now I know the reason for my misfortune. I knew that the amount of food I have been consuming and the lack of exercise, could not possibly be the reasons.

I just discovered this important info below. Please share with all your friends.
I don’t know WHY I didn’t figure this out sooner!!!!!
It’s the shampoo I use in the shower!
When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body, and (duh!)
Printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning,
“FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY.”
No WONDER I have been gaining weight!!!
Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start using Dawn    dish soap instead. Its label reads:

“DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE.”

Problem solved! If I don’t answer the phone . . . I’ll be in the shower!

See you guys later. I am off to buy some dish soap! I could use some weight loss fairies.

Or some Joy.

Images:
Fairy Dish Soap
© juliegomoll | Flickr Creative Commons

Look What We Found Hiding Under Our Sink…
© semarr/Sarah Marriage | Flickr Creative Commons

Want to Lose Weight? Buy New Clothing.

I don’t know how it is for others. For me it seems to be a no fail plan. I go out, spend a fortune some money on new clothing and then I seem to find the motivation to stop stuffing my face start watching my food intake.

I was thinking about it (something I do way too often) and came to the conclusion that it is probably not that simple.

It’s kind of like the which came first, the chicken or the egg, debate. Do you lose weight because you have bought new clothing that fits you and you feel good wearing them? Or did you buy the clothing in the first place because you were feeling better about yourself and that feeling better was the impetus for the clothing buying and the weight losing? (You might need to reread that a few times for it to make sense.)

Or maybe it’s a little bit of both rolled into one. Either way, it doesn’t matter. I had enough of the uncomfortable feeling of mushing my fat rolls every time I sit down. (And yes, I know, too much information.)

I am slowly getting back on the band wagon. It is not easy physically or mentally but I feel a bit lighter both mentally and physically.

Wish me luck.

Do you find that buying clothing is a good way to find the motivation to lose weight?

Image:
BEAUTIFUL WOMAN SHOPPING
© Katrina Brown | Dreamstime.com

An Angel Disguised As A Devil

My husband is an angel, a devil, an angel, a devil……

Disclaimer: My husband is thin, no potbelly.

I guess it all comes down to whether he is trying to get me to exercise class or not.

Like at 7am this morning, the last thing I wanted to do was get my body out of my warm cozy bed and brave the freezing cold outside (anything other than room temperature is freezing cold for me in the morning) in order to get on a bike in a room full of people who would within 5 minutes be sweaty and smelly and while trying not to go deaf from the loud music to try to make it through the spinning class. (And that was a run on sentence on purpose, after reading it, you should be as breathless as I am while exercising,)

I was so hopeful that he would cave and not want to go to the class this morning because after landing at 4am from overseas, I figured he would be tired. I almost got him to stay in bed, and then I made the mistake of saying yes, why don’t we stay in bed, we can go for a walk later.

He was out of bed in two seconds flat prodding me to get out of bed. (I am guessing I have used that line once too many and never actually went on the walks I promised.)

So I moaned and groaned. I somehow got myself dressed (exercise clothing is a whole other post!) with my eyes closed and I went to spinning. I lived through the class. (shh…don’t tell anyone but between the bouts of thinking I was going to die, I did at times even enjoy myself) And afterwards, I felt good.

So it seems that maybe my devil is an angel in disguise. (And besides at least I get to ogle his sexy legs when he exercises with me.)

Image:
FRIENDHIP: UNCONDITIONAL LOVE
© Simon Liistro | Dreamstime.com

I Think I am On To Jillian Michaels’ Strategy

Last night I did the 30 Day Shred workout DVD by Jillian Michaels.  That woman is brilliantly sadistic.  Jumping jacks, weights, crunches- and bears, oh my!  Holy moly I am sore this morning.  Granted, I feel great.  I feel like I accomplished something.  I feel like I should have felt 6 months ago when I bought the DVD.

This morning, I feel lighter.  I feel like I can take on the world.  I don’t know if this is a side effect of the exercise (as exercise increases endorphines) or because Jillian has actually motivated me.  I actually wanted her to yell at me more during the workout.  I wanted her to scream about my fat arse, flabby arms and wobbly stomach.  I need that. I don’t want people to be nice to me when I am doing crunches.  If I have someone telling me nice things it makes me think “oh I can just give half the effort.  They won’t mind at all”.  Jillian told me the truth.  If you give half you won’t even get half the results.

I actually last night thought “This, now, this is how I am going to lose weight!”  This morning I am thinking “I am going to lose weight because I can’t lift my arms to put any food in my mouth.”  I have Jillian all figured out.

New Year New Body

Ok, World, I am starting afresh.  I am resolved to change my body for the better.  When I started this blog (although on blogspot at the time…and a bit less committed…) I was 216 lbs and wanted to basically shame myself thin.  Guess what?  I am still 216lbs.  Yes, I did well there for a bit, but then I got sick, and made excuses, and then the holidays came.   So, I will be keeping track of my weight loss journey here…again…with all my snide comments, successes, failures, wobbles, and such.  I, however, have a support group this time.  As well as Susie, who is a great motivator, I will also be a part of a group of ladies who are sharing their support online.  Our motto-  New Year, New Body.

Toning Sneakers+Spinning=Deadly Combination

Let me clarify that.

When I say deadly combination, what I am NOT saying is: “Wow! Toning sneakers and spinning are together an amazing combination.”

No, I am talking about deadly as in they want to kill me.

One small word (actually many loudly spoken words) of advice for those who are insane lucky enough to own (or have won) toning sneakers.

DO NOT WEAR THE TONING SNEAKERS ALL DAY IF YOU ARE PLANNING ON GOING TO A SPINNING CLASS THE SAME EVENING.

Because if you do, you may actually find out what it feels like to have legs that refuse to take any more instructions from you and refuse to pedal. One thing is for sure, your legs will be very angry with you.

 

So remember these words of caution from the owner of some very sore muscles.

 

These sneakers

when used in combination with these spinning shoes

is enough to make you want to curl up in a ball and lose the will to walk.

Like I said, deadly combination.

 

Is there anything else I should know about????

 

 

Padding Isn’t Lacking, So How The Heck Does It Hurt? (So Much!)

I don’t get it. I am not lacking in padding in my bum.

So how the heck does every single bone in that region kill? Even sitting on the toilet hurts.(Yes, I know. That was too much information, but I hurt too much to care.)

I can’t believe I lived through the agony that was getting up/sitting down, getting up/sitting down in spinning class tonight. Good thing the music is really loud so no one heard my moaning and groaning. (Well maybe my husband did, but he’s used to the complaining.)

This does get better right? Because I am walking kinda funny.

On the bright side, I am sure I burned off the chocolate I ate when I got home. (Bad, Bad Susie.)

Image:
ELEPHANT MARCH
© William Warby | Flickr Creative Commons

Suprisingly, I Am Still Alive, Breathing And Able To Walk (Sort Of)

In my quest to be kind to myself and live my life properly, I am slowly easing myself diving headfirst into exercise after being a coach potato for years. I have a feeling that this time I am going to do a bit better then my measly attempts over the past few years to stick to some kind of exercise program.

After having tortured myself gone to a Pilates class yesterday , I thought it would be a good idea to go to a spinning class this morning. I dragged my husband along My husband was happy to sign up for the class with me and this morning about 3 hours after he landed from overseas, he found himself on a bike next to me.

Instrument of Torture

It has been quite a few years since I have gone spinning and close to nine years since I taught spinning. (Yes, the mighty have fallen. Going from teaching spinning to trying not to die in class is quite a plunge.) But I made it. Look, I even smiled.

Lucky for me the teacher was really good and enthusiastic. Time passed really quickly after the first ten minutes. At the five minute mark I was already dying and counting minutes. After that for the most part I lost track of time. I did have a moment, 40 minutes into class when I lost the will to live I ran out of steam, but surprisingly I made it through.

And now if I could just move enough to get undressed and shower, it would be good.

Do you think the hundreds of calories I must have burned in spinning means that today, unlike yesterday I can choose this

over this?

Nah, that would defeat the whole purpose.

 

Any tips for the aches and pains anyone?